Thursday, 15 March 2012

top 5

I feel better. Nimble, like a cat. All that stiffness and most of the pain is gone and I can move around all silky and free like liquid. It's great. Now that I'm sitting here with my laptop perched on two old atlases to keep it at eye level (I'm correcting my posture) I need something to talk about. So here are my top 5 top 5 lists.

5. Top 5 craazzyy laws, including just what you're allowed to do with your pets and the size of the stick you're allowed to beat your wife with.
4. Top 5 inappropriate commercials
3. Top 5 Bottom 5 lists
2. Top 5 ways Top 5 lists are better than Bottom 10 lists
1. Top 5 Top 10 lists of the Top 10 worst Top 5 lists

This list itself is Number 2 in the Top 5 Top 5 Top 5 lists, which is itself featured in my Top 10 Top 5 Top 5 Top 5 Top 5 lists. That list is in turn Number 3 on the Top 100 worst Top 10 Top 5 Top 5 Top 5 Top 5 lists. It's a neverending cycle of lists formed by nerds who need to structure every aspect of this crazy, seemingly unknowable world in which we find ourselves. Everything is structured in Top 5s because the internet is one big collective Rain Man consciousness. Top 5 movies, Bottom 5 movies, Top 10 songs, Top 10 songs that always show up in Top 10 Worst song lists. And so on.

This post is Number 3 on my Top 3 blogs posts.

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