In the future, when the Church of Niallology begins to fall apart because of its dissenting members and my pyschic powers begin to fade; when we fill the sky with toxic gases and poison our oceans; when we're out of oil and have to find some other way of powering our cars (if we still have them); when we've survived several alien invasions and the entire world has been brought together as a single nation, "cosmically callused" against future invaders; when we discover the super-intelligent, mutant descendants of our pet fish in the radioactive sewers beneath our towering mega-cities - it seems we'll be looking for a way to undo such a mess.
I'm talking about time travel. (Cue theme from Back to the Future).
But you'd think if it were possible there would be people walking into the United Nations right now claiming to be from the future with some golden ideas on how to work together against the coming alien apocalypse. You'd also think the World Trade Centre bombings would never have happened because scores of self-proclaimed heroes from the future have tried to stop the attacks and, statistically speaking, someone has to succeed eventually. But then again, maybe no one travels back this far because they've read what passes for historical records in their time and don't want to encounter the primitive, murderous barbarians of the 21st century. Or maybe they think they'll freeze instantly in the biting, below-one-hundred-degrees-celcius frost of the world before global warming.
Or maybe the concept is impossible. Now I know this is old news, but I'll bring it up anyway. A while ago someone came across a background extra in Charlie Chaplin's film The Circus talking to herself with her hand against her ear. It looked suspiciously as if she were on a hand phone and everyone was like "OH MY GOD SHE'S A TIME TRAVELLER!!!"
...Ok then, budding representatives of man's intelligence. If that's the case, then WHO WAS SHE TALKING TO? Did someone else travel back in time with another cellphone. Can cell phone towers travel through time? Thankfully someone offered an explanation about a hearing aid or something which shut those rumours up.
Time travel is an interesting plot point in movies and books. But as a thing that people take seriously and want so desperately to believe, because they dream of walking with dinosaurs and getting wasted on water-converted wine at the Last Supper, it's a bit too much like some weird cult for my taste.
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